Attending Family Court Hearings

Taliah Drayak, PAR Development Lead has developed a short guide on what to do when going to court for your child.

We recognise that most people never go to court so it can be very frightening. We hope you have a solicitor. If you need a solicitor please contact Find a Solicitor | Law Society of Scotland

Facing family court when your child is the subject of the court case can feel overwhelming — You wouldn’t be human if you were not frightened, confused, or upset. But if at the moment there is a court hearing considering matters relating to your child, attending your hearing is one of the most important things you can do for your child. Your presence shows the court that you are engaged, responsible, and putting your child first. This article will help you understand what to expect and how to prepare so you can present yourself confidently and respectfully.

Why You Must Attend — Even If It’s Hard

Not attending sends a message that you do not prioritise your child — even if that is not true. Sheriffs and Children’s Hearing panels expect parents to be present. Being there shows commitment, willingness to work with professionals, and respect for the process. Even if you are not allowed to speak much during the hearing, your behaviour, body language, and reliability are noticed.

Preparing Before the Day

• Find the correct court address and how to get there. Look up directions in advance — check transport, parking, and time of travel.

• Plan to arrive at least 30 minutes early. Courts often have security checks and can be confusing to navigate.

• Look for a map of the court online or inside the building — some courts will have signage, but it may not be immediately clear.

• Bring something appropriate to occupy your time — a notebook to write in, a magazine or a quiet book. Phones may be restricted.

• Do not bring food or drinks unless allowed. Water might be fine — check signs or ask the usher.

How to Dress

Family court is a formal environment. Dress as you would for a job interview or important appointment:

• Wear clean, modest clothing.

• Avoid slogans, revealing outfits, or anything that could appear disrespectful.

• Keep jewellery, perfumes, and strong makeup minimal. (we do not care about this, but unfortunately we know mother’s have been judged for how they appear)

Your goal is to appear calm, respectful, and focused on your child. 

What to Expect at Court

• Courts are very formal spaces. You must remain quiet and respectful at all times — no interrupting or reacting emotionally during proceedings.

• There may be a long wait. Your case will have a time slot, but the schedule often runs late. This is normal.

• A court usher will often greet you. They are there to guide you, tell you when and where to go, and answer practical questions about the process — but they cannot discuss your case or give legal advice.

• You may not be allowed to speak. Sometimes only your solicitor or social worker can speak. Do not interrupt. If you are unsure whether you can speak, ask your solicitor quietly or wait to be invited by the judge. Children’s hearings are much less formal to the court room, and in this space, it is reasonable to request an opportunity to be invited to speak, and only speak during your turn.

• Everything you do is observed. How you sit, listen, and respond will influence how professionals view your commitment to your child.

During the Hearing

• Stay calm — even if you hear something you strongly disagree with.

• If you need to pass a message to your solicitor, write it quietly.

• Do not roll your eyes, sigh loudly, whisper angrily, or walk out.

• Remember: your behaviour reflects how you may act as a parent in stressful situations.

Put Your Child First — In Everything

The court’s only focus is your child’s safety and welfare. Show that you are doing the same. That means:

• Being present and prepared.

• Showing respect to everyone — even if you disagree with them.

• Demonstrating maturity, responsibility, and co-operation.

Final Encouragement

You may feel scared — that is completely normal. But attending your hearing is an act of love and responsibility. Even on the hardest days, your effort matters. Arriving calm, respectful, and prepared sends a powerful message: I am here for my child, and I am willing to do what it takes.

You do not have to be perfect — just present, respectful, and focused on what truly matters: your child’s future.